so i am almost a year sober. have a vegan insta feed going. lots of good things in life, big plans ahead.
i will use this more. i swear! lol…
recovery of the mind & body. i am growing one day at a time.
boiling fresh chickpeas. bought a new huge tea mug. trying to get back to normal…
getting ready & pulling an all nighter so that i can hopefully sleep on the plane. my two week east coast vacation starts now. my sister is a flight attendant so i’ll be offered a million free drinks on the plane. i’ll also be seeing multiple best friends that just a year ago knew the “normal drinker” me. so the “i’ve told you i have a drinking problem, don’t be a dick” me will be up and ready. i bleached the kitchen up and down and it looks beautiful. this is what i expect when i get home. i start summer school (4, 5 hour long classes a week) the next day so as long as my roommate respects my wishes all will be well when i get home. i need this vacay. it also always makes me appreciate san francisco and how different/awesome it is from the east coast. i’ve been starting to take my situation for granted. oh, and speaking of my wonderful situation, rent just went up 90 bucks. thanks google. 😛
i plan on getting a new canon rebel at b and h when i get to nyc. photos to come.
i was really close… almost out of the woods… until i get three voicemails from my dad… THIS close to making it a whole day without breaking down crying for whatever reason.
i left my phone in the kitchen after i got back from the gym. i didn’t hear it ring, not that i would, i always keep it on silent. he must be drunk… but my favorite one is the one where he says that “if his kids were worth anything they would answer the phone.” it’s surprising how voicemails only 26 seconds long can pack such a punch. i tried getting in contact with my mom today, but she didn’t respond. just asked how she was…
just like every alcoholic i don’t have the best parents. at least my mom got better as i got older, but before 12, she was pretty much the worst. i guess she tried and had to deal with a dick head who hardly worked. it was the typical 90s story. mom worked or went out when she had free time so we never had a dinner made. this is where i began my obsession with peanut butter out of the jar and eating top ramen raw. hot pockets and pringles. i wasn’t introduced to “normal people/healthy food” until i was a teenager. that’s what happens when you have kids when you are 20. you ruin their life, and yours.
i couldn’t even listen to the last message. i turned off my phone.